So picture this little snap shot my holiday weekend:
It’s Monday morning, Memorial Day. My 1-year-old did an awesome job keeping me up from 3am to 5 am, just an hour shy of when my 5-year-old wakes up for the day. I grab my phone and hop on YouTube. This girl needs to get some serious inspiration before she spends the last day of holiday weekend acting just as crabby as she felt. I immediately tapped on this video of Oprah’s biggest life lessons because let’s face it, Oprah can make anyone feel better, right? After listening to a compilation of her most impactful commencement speeches and interviews, the biggest takeaway for me was this:
Do the work then let it go.
You always hear the advice about doing the work to get the life you want. People will also tell you to let go of what you can’t control so you can be present in the moment instead of worrying about what may or may not happen.
So how in the world do these two things go together? She explains it as doing everything you can to achieve your goal and then let go of all the emotional attachments you have to the outcome.
For me, I took it a step further. Do the work that’s necessary to forge the life you want and let go of all the negative feelings, disappointments, and anxiety over what may happen if you do.
Yeah, I know it’s easier said than done but it puts things in perspective. Doing the work — the real nitty-gritty, soul-searching work that has to happen in order to heal and recover from whatever life may have thrown at you is hard. But part of what makes it hard or worse, makes you give up, is holding onto all that unnecessary baggage along the way. When you let all of that hurt, loneliness, and negative self-talk go, you free up the energy to do the work that makes you a better you. And when you get there, to that place you’ve always dreamed about, the victory is all the sweeter.
You did the work.
You let all that negative shit go.
As I delve deeper into this monster of a fantasy project I’ve taken on, I have to remember that my characters have to do the work they need to be heroes. They also need to let go of everything that holds them back. I mean if it were easy, it wouldn’t be much of a story, right? And that may involve tapping into my current struggle. My personal work and process of letting go of the feelings of hurt, betrayel, loneliness, and self doubt my divorce has brought on. I have to be the hero I need and the hero my little girls deserve.
So as I lay in bed, coming to a new and marvelous revelation, my 1-year-old commences her renewed crying campaign and my five-year-old charges in to let me know about it.
But that’s okay.
This mom is in a better mood. I have the energy I need to make this day a great one for myself and my two munchkins. I’m ready to get to work on this thing we call motherhood and author life.
Thank you, Oprah.